This just in…

So, when I moved to NPR, I knew that, if certain things weren’t fixed, that it would be a bad idea.  I moved in with one of the girls that I work with, with no romantic involvement AT ALL.  I can assure you of that.  She has a child, and a baby’s daddy.  This man has no job, has no money, and has no car.  The reason I moved in was to help her with the bills.  He decided that he wanted to be a bitch about it and emotionally beat her down until she gave in and told me I had to move out.  So, while this may see selfish, I AM GOING TO BE SELFISH for a minute.  I think after 25 years of service to humanity, I can take this liberty.  It is bullshit.  Because of this man, and I use the term lightly, I will have to spend around $250 a month in gas just to get to and from work because I will have to stay at my parents house until I can get first/last/security for myself to get a place.  This man has no right to be a father, and he has no right to be around his kid.  Now, because of him, she will have no rent and bill money this month, and they will get evicted.  Fuck this, fuck this, fuck this.  I hate to use the word Drama so much in my day to day life because I sound ghetto when I do, but this is exactly the kind of drama I try to stay away from, and because out of the goodness in me, and my willingness to help out, I am getting fucked.

I am on my lunch break right now, and i came home to hopefully talk some sense into this “man” and see if he will just suck it up and accept the fact that he is a dead beat, but he won’t even come out of the bedroom to talk to me face to face.  Nothing says “I have a mangina” like pure cowardice.  Oh well, fuck it.  Maybe when I get off of work I’ll be able to get some time with him, when his schedule of weed smoking and TV watching isn’t so full.

-doug out.

Lost in my own backyard.

Work was hell today.  Lots of heavy lifting and hot, hot weather.  It’s over though, so I am just relaxing, catching up on some tech news and slumming around the net.  My Ex Boss stopped by the store today to pick up the last of his things.  It was good seeing him.  He looked relaxed, maybe a little sad, but that’s to be expected.  I don’t really know how i feel about this new place I am in.  I have been working in NPR for several months, and I’m fairly familiar with the place, but I always feel lost.  Good thing I didn’t follow that whim to move to Seattle a few months ago, I don’t know what I would have done there.  Just saw that a band from Tooth and Nail records is coming to my old church, being presented by Fire Escape.  Yeah, I take a little pride in that.  Like a child has grown up.  Too bad organized religion and myself aren’t on speaking terms.  I’m listening to Sage Francis’ “A Healthy Distrust” album tonight, listen along if you’d like.

Stranger in a Strange Land

Moved out to New Port Richey today. The net is hooked up, and its good to be back on the grid. There is going to be a lot more to do around here, but I’ll probably spend most of my time at the library and bookstores. I’m updating windows right now, and catching up on old episodes of Geek Brief TV, Systm, Diggnation, TRS, and others. Feels like I am visiting old friends.

Kinda sad though. Don’t really know what i am doing out here, or where my life will go. Everything happened kinda quick. Oh well, I guess if you can’t roll with the punches you need to get out of the ring, which is something that I can’t let myself do.

Here’s to a new day.

The Prodigal

Moving out today. Going to get over to NPR, about 3 minutes away from work. Freaking awesome. No more one hour commutes. No more $55 in gas a week. I can walk if I want to.

just sucks that I have to pack everything back up.

My mom came in to my room crying and gave me a hug, she said that she would miss me.

I’m gonna miss her too.

Alcoholic Amnesiac

I went to Brian’s house last night for his “get together.” Started off with some Sparks that I bought on the way there, moved on to more than a few glasses of Gin and juice, and somewhere along the way did a shot of the Captain. I drank a lot. All I can remember is taking off the devil’s mask that i was wearing and then waking up to my phone’s alarm clock at 7:30am. Sometime in between those moments I took a lot of pictures i don’t remember, I vomited on myself, texted Brian, and passed out in the bath room. After I woke up I left and drove home and went back to sleep. Even though i was sober in the morning, i have no recollection of the 30 min drive home, which is scary to say the least. Oh well, back to work tomorrow.

Modern Day Johnny Appleseed…

Just got off of work.  Glad to find out that I misjudged my new boss.  He’s a cool guy.  Had to stay extra late tonight because we had to make sure that we hit our numbers.  Maybe one day I’ll explain what that means.  For now, accept that it means we couldn’t do our job right this week, our fault or otherwise.  But, thats an hour ago, and this is now, and I’m going to go take a shower and get ready for a party tonight.  Can’t wait to get some gin in me, make this whole week disappear.  Until next time, remember, stay black, die black.

-doug out.